bad day!!!

Today was a really bad day. I had a page written about how bad it was, but I decided I don't want to put that out into the cosmos anymore. I wish I didn't have to go to work tomorrow so that I can have a recovery day even though I had the last two days off...today kicked me in the behind!

On the bright side A and I cleaned out the garage and A moved the boxes I want to be donated all to the garage in one corner so if we ever get our hands on a truck for a few hours we can quickly move it all out. Our garage was DIRTY and it still is but A swept it out, I guess that's what we get for the garage being on a dirt alley!

I also picked up the living room, which took all of 10 minutes but still it feels good. I need to fold some laundry (a load in the dryer right now and one sitting on the couch. I wish I wanted to do it right now to get it done with but instead I want to sit here and mope a little more. I am really excited to say that since last weeks mad cleaning spree, the living room, the bathroom, and R's room have STAYED clean! Write it down in the history book!! I actually think that if I just got the kitchen and bedroom clean and kept this up I'd be good! The house would stay clean. I hope?

We went to the doctor today too...A asked about my water breaking again, that's how labor started with R and it was 7 hours start to finish with her, one hour of pushing. She said "well it's not very likely in the first place but since it happened your first time, it's more likely to happen again" OK then I said "I think I am more concerned about it NOT breaking since that was such an obvious start to labor" so then we talked about how long it took for contractions to start and how now that this is my second time it will be more obvious to me. Then, this is what got me surprised, she said "If your water breaks...come strait in, and if not, when contractions are 7-8 minutes apart get in here!" I asked about the 5 minute rule that we usually hear about and she said "with second babies coming faster and especially with your history of fast labor I want you here earlier rather than later" So much for laboring at home as long as possible.

in craft news:

-my needlepoint is MIA (BUMMER!)

-I got the last two blocks for the JoAnns BOTM and need to figure out how to applique for those four blocks and I need to make the two new ones plus one that I have on the desk now. I just don't want to iron. Silly isn't it? I just don't want to iron so I wont sew! Maybe tomorrow

-I spent my fun money from my mom on new car seats....I wanted to spend it on fabric for my dress or for a new quilt project or something else! I need to get some batting too!

so basically, nothing is happening here but maybe I will get over that iron hurdle or my taxes will come back so I can go to the store =)

conversations with R

R was playing with A's headphones and had one up to one ear and the other ear pod up to her mouth like a phone....and she was "talking" to my brother. Here is what she had to say:

"Oh Hi Dude!"
"yeah, I good!"
"No, I no talk to MeMa."
"what so phunny"
"No you so silly!"
"I yuve you too!"
"No,I go play with choo choo now! Bye!"

Also today She was asking about my mom:

"Where Mema?"
"In Paris! with PePa!"
"Send MeMa flowers?"
"you want to send her flowers?"
"Yeah!" *snif snif* "Smell good!"
"Yes, flowers do smell good don't they?"
"Send MeMa smell good flowers. No PePa!"
"PePa doenst get any flowers?"
"No. PePa smells yuckie"

Isn't it funny what they come up with?

happy birthday R!!!

R is three today! Three! I can't believe it! She's not my baby anymore and she's not my little buddy any more, she is my beautiful little girl. We tried a new night night plan last night that mostly worked. She still ended up in bed with me in the middle of the night but she got herself down in her own room to start with which had become a problem for the last few months. I swore I'd never let her sleep in bed with me but I am so exhausted and she has been scared of her own room so much lately. I think it's the neighbor working on his car outside her room at night but I can't be sure because I am not her.

Anyways, R's day has been good. I had to work this morning, but she slept in anyways! 9:30! Why wasn't I home for that? Then when I came home she was watching Tom and Jerry (she loves that cartoon but I think its too grown up for her so it is a special treat) and watching Mac and Cheese! I gave her her "coffee" and she was in seventh heaven! we all read the newspaper in my bed (notice it's MY bed now, not A and my bed? hahaha I take up the whole thing especially when R is with me) She also got a train set (do you remember the little wood ones with the magnetic trains?) and she LOVED IT!!

In unrelated things, I cheated here, I am sure I am breaking all sorts of copyright laws, but I wanted to show you what the quilt is I want to make in hopes you can help me track it down. I do have a back up plan (in fact two but I think one will count for the challenge so I will do THAT one!) but still this is the top I REALLY want to do! I think I have enough pinks in my stash that won't be used for much else to at least get me started. Anyways, so I don't get shut down, or sued, or...whatever may happen for copyright infringement in a blog here's all the information I have on the page I took a picture of: It's from Better Homes and Gardens Quilt Pink for Hope book Meredith Corporation, Des Moins Iowa copyright 2008. The quilt is on pages 10-11, made by Debbie Richards and Mary Morris. Um...any information I might be leaving out? I need to find my MLA handbook or my APA style book to make that all more "neat" looking and what not but for now that will have to do! I just love how it's made with many different pinks and one white I think, maybe more but it's not "scrappy" looking...I am such a fan of "clean" looking quilts. As much as I want to make a scrap quilt, it has to be organized and not too busy. I also am a little obsessed with pink right now....I sort of hope that this baby is a girl so that I can keep the pink theme going on. Blue is a favorite color too but I tend to go for the girly blues.

Lastly, you can now vote on the challenge stuff, go vote! There are some cool things, and some unfinished things like mine!

advice needed, and a better mood

After a lovely afternoon with a friend who is in a better place spiritually than I am (I am at a point where I am confident in my faith and secure in my relationship with the Higher Being I believe in but I am struggling to give it up to Him/Them. I keep trying to make a plan for my life and force things to happen when I want them to instead of listening for the encouragement and direction that is there for me. I need to let go!) I am in a better mood than my last post (which embarrassingly enough was just hours ago!) I thought I'd even share a sweet cuddle with R and I that we shared last night. we had just finished a good tickle war and were ready to cuddle and watch a movie with daddy.

While I was gone, A got a little property tax refund check in the mail $60 worth so what did we do with it? Pay a bill? Deposit it so our rent check doesn't overdraw us? Nope, we went SHOPPING!!! We bought a pizza from Costco and hit up Target! Responsible Lisa kept thinking "we can't do this!" but Lisa who's been so careful and frugal these past months said "LETS GO!!!! Our Tax Refund should be here any day anyways!"

we got some gladware on sale and some ziploc bags on clearance, I got some more Tums for my heartburn, two canvas cubes for R's toys (I'll get a picture of those later once her room is clean and they are all organized!) and some cute onesies for a boy. I was looking for a "coming home" outfit for a boy, but Target didn't have anything good! I am going to take some of my tip money next week and again not pay a bill with it but instead buy some thank you notes, birth announcements if I can find any! and check out ShopKo, Walmart, and K-Mart for a boys coming home outfit. Why aren't there many I want something nice! It's a big event! A good friend bought R something special and gave it to us at the hospital, I had packed a few onesies but really didn't think about it before hand. This time that will NOT be the case! This baby, boy or girl will have something special to wear home!

I should mention I have already picked out and bought the sweetest little dress for a girl. I know the picture is hard to see but it reads "daddys girl" on the chest. I got it on clearance but it's a "3m" instead of "nb" oh well! If I remember correctly when it wasn't on clearance it was 1) WAY too expensive at $14.99 and 2) they were sold out of "nb" already! I just think its sweet and special but not stiff. Baby is coming in late July, early August, so we need something that wont be too hot! I already have some onesies for a girl thanks to R, but a little part of me wants to buy something special for this child if it's a girl. I am sure I can get some things after it's born for the 3m/6m/9m etc since children grow out of the newborns so quickly!

For an update on quilting things, my aunt bought the last two blocks for the JoAnn's Block of the Month for me and even offered to buy the setting kit online but I had gotten my hands on it for more than 50% off a few weeks ago. She had gone to three stores I think to find the two blocks I was missing. They should be in the mail and here any day now! I only have the blocks to applique left until those two get here. I need to figure out how to do the applique, but I Am putting it off until the last possible moment! does anyone have any good advice for applique? great step by step places?

My brothers girlfriend (way to lead into that one sorry folks!) is going on the Western Washington Shop Hop with my mom and her friends this year since I can't make it (see see it kind of makes sense!) When I facebooked her and teased her about it she said I could come too, and then told me she was going to try to make a quilt this summer with my mom! GREAT! Welcome to the family! break up with B and he's out! Anyways I am really excited for her and can't wait until she catches the bug. At the same time one of the blogs I read is doing a step by step how to make a quilt. I decided I will go ahead an join in and follow her since theres so much I don't know how to do yet. I have three or four quilts I'd like to make following her along, number one being from the "Quilt Pink for Hope" book, but it's not a block pattern....if you have the book, page 10/11! I want to make THAT! It's called "in the Pink Posies" with a "posy block" but I can't find directions for it online. That's my number one choice to make. Anyone have any advice on where I can get my hands on that pattern or at least one I can use as a basis for this one? I have two back ups so if no one can find anything I have other choices but this is by far my first choice!

irritable!!!!

this is non quilting related, mostly, so if you are just interested in my passion for quilting...this is not the post for you. I haven't worked on ANYTHING in the last week ish! I miss it but I need some SPACE!!!

so you all know A isn't working. That means he's home. All the time. Whenever I am home. OK he actually goes and "runs errands" and "looks for a job" but I have no idea what he actually does. While he's gone I am home with R. I love R to death and I love A like none other, but seriously, I need some space! I need some quiet time! I need some peace and quiet. Now what's funny is I have yelled this at the top of my lungs "I NEED SOME PEACE AND QUIET PLEASE!!!!" to get nothing. Now R says it with the same tone I do and then she sits in my lap and asks me to sing "where is thumbkin?" Not quite right but I like the idea there sweetie.

I am already irritable because I am pregnant and hormonal. I am more irritable because my body aches since I am working on my feet at least 30 hours a week, and where I work it's not like you get a break, you are either cleaning or serving people with very little if any down time. My only time to relax is in the car on the way to or from work, no good! I need more. I need some time at home when I have peace, where I am by myself. I need to be able to run errands by myself (but now we don't have any money for errands...I want to get some things to organize and decorate the house mostly and fabric)

The fact that I don't have any space or time to myself for months now has worn me down and made me snap at the littlest, stupidest things. I am more stressed out than I need to be or should be and not just because we arent able to pay our bills. I never truly appreciated the peace and stillness when I had it. I took it for granted and even wanted more sometimes, now that I have none and see how essential it is to someones happiness I miss it!

OK, enough whining! off to play outside with the princess!

Simpsons Quilt

I was cutting out the fabric I had for A's Simpson's quilt and was trying to figure out how much of the rest of the fabrics I need to buy for it. I already had my orange, red, and green cut into 3"squares and a few of the 9" Simpson's material squares. My plan is to do a nine patch next to a big square...so I guess kind of like an Irish chain or...I know there's a name for what I am doing but I did come up with the idea before I saw the patterns. I just was going off what on earth I could do with that crazy Simpson's fabric!

Here are a bunch of pictures of the materials I have cut out, mind you I still want to buy coordinating yellow, tan, lime green, (maybe will exchange for the current green) cobalt blue, and a sky blue. I want the quilt to be crazy, since the main fabric is. I just don't want it to be so crazy you get sick. Hence my questions here.

This first picture is one color, which is not what I am planning on doing at all, but for demo's sake....should I do the 9 patches alternating like these two or all the same?

So the next picture is the same as above with two different fabrics in the 9 patch...alternating....I forgot to tell you, pretend my brown desk is black squares. I think the black will tone it down a little bit but not take away from the chaos.

This next picture shows even more tamed down, using the same 9 patch in different colors. I think I would do more black than color, I forgot to take a picture the other way around but you can use your imaginations if you think that I should do more color less black...this is actually the one I am leaning towards but I am just worried it won't be wild enough!

Now this one has my original plan of mismatched 9 patches. Here (are cute fingers and ) the same block, again blacks are 5 of the 9's. yes, imagine more colors, more chaos. This is actually my second choice because it's wild but organised....this one would take a good amount of planning, but at the same time not much and so it would be fun.

Lastly, this is the craziest, the original plan but it scares me a little because I don't like messes. I think it would compliment the Simpson's fabric the best, busy and insane.

I cut the Simpson's fabric for borders too, 3 inches for that fabric, I was going to do a black border too, and who knows what else will happen....maybe one with left over squares, maybe a white one, maybe nothing else....we will cross that bridge when we get there!

"fabric blankies"

That is what R calls quilts, it actually sounds more like "babric kikis"

I have told you this all more than once, but I am going to reiterate here for us all. I promised myself I would never move onto the next project before the one I am working on is finished. Yeah, I broke that one! It all started when I gave up on my Christmas project last year (aprons, tree skirts, pillows, and a quilt with the left overs) because the Apron pattern was a little vague on how to do it and I couldn’t find some of the supplies I needed for it. Away into a tub everything went until I had some more patience and less pressure for Christmas things to be done by Christmas (and it is all sitting there waiting patiently for me to try again.)

Then, one day, A saw me bring home some new finds from JoAnn’s or Ben Franklin and told me “no more new fabric until you use up some of what you already have!” He obviously is not a quilter! (nor a fabric fanatic) I keep telling him it’s something my dad just rolls his eyes with when mom does and has learned to keep his mouth shut so A should too! With A not working though I decided I could follow that rule, mostly. Some projects I can’t finish until I get more (and we are just talking tops here!) The problem is I don’t have much in the way of backing fabric! I have two tops that need backing, three (including those two) that need batting,….oh I will just list them out for you:

Projects in the Works:
Lavender Mist BOTM -4 blocks done, missing two, need backing, batting, binding (and missing blocks)
Princess Blankie- I think I have batting that will work for this, so I just need to sandwich and quilt it
Jackies Quilt - need batting, have backing
Dora Quilt- need to find a border for it, backing, batting, binding etc.
Christmas Quilt- backing, batting, binding
Simpsons Quilt- for A- I need to find more flannel fabrics to go with it and then make it! but everything I have so far is cut and ready to go
Christmas Combo Pack- this is the thing I set aside, I think for now gathering the rest of the supplies will be on the agenda, then maybe the tree skirts would be the place to start, I know the pillow will be easy and the quilt will be with left overs so that’ll be last of the set

I have a whole slew of other projects I have mentioned before that I want to get cracking on but I am going to stop myself from starting anything new for the moment until those are DONE (well maybe not the last one). Well, with an exception:

I joined the Because I Matter Challenge! I am a late commer but Tracey was so kind to allow me to join. The rules are you have to make something(s) for YOU! all the things above are for other people, or in the case of the Lavender Mist BOTM, who knows who it’s for but it is not just for me! R and I sat on the washer and dryer today for about 20 minutes while I looked at all the stuff I have and tried to figure out what I wanted to make for ME. Here is what we came up with:
Because I Matter Challenge:
1) Families are like Quilts needlepoint -it’s been a while since I have done cross stitch, something to do in front of the TV
2) 2005 Western Washington Shop Hop- blocks and maybe turn it into a quilt…I am a little intimidated by this, hence it’s now 2009 but I WANT to do it so here is my inspiration (by the way, if you want to read my rant and rave about shop hops, pop on over to my blog at allpeoplequilt.com and if you haven’t done so already, skim through some of the other ladies blogs, many of them are truly AMAZING!!
3) Quilt Scrapbook- I need to update it since I now have a camera and a few projects that are close to being done, so before I forget the details
4) Dress- I bought a pattern and some fabric for a dress I loved on display at JoAnn’s last summer, I need to find some blue fabric to use under the dress or a pink ribbon…yes I want to make two, but we will start with one for now and see how it goes!
5) Garden Path- I found the magazine for it and A said I could make it in blue and green instead of pink and green….so by the time the challenge ends my goal is not to have the quilt done, or even started, but to have found the fabric for it! I really want to use big blue hydrangea flower fabric for it so I am keeping my eyes out!
6) Leaders and Enders/Scrap Quilts- true, they will be for my guests once I own a house with a guest room (probably my sewing room too…wait I told you all about this and showed you my doodles!) so the goal is to get this started even if that means I just buy the fabric and have a few leaders/enders going. We will see!
I will be posting my challenge progress both here and on the challenge page. I may also start another project or two for fun but I do have a baby coming in Aug….so this might be a nice list for now but one that takes more than a summer to tackle. That’s OK. Ambitious goals are fun and driving forces right? And as much as A complains about my sewing (mostly when hes watching a game or a movie) he admits I am more pleasant to be around when the machine is going. my game plan starting this weekend is to work on the unfinished projects whenever I can and work on the challenge stuff for at least 10 minutes a day every day. I will set a timer to make sure I am committed, and will probably have some times when I am on a roll and don’t want to stop but the family will have to leave me alone for those 10 minutes the timer is counting away.

OH OH!!!! I can’t believe I almost forgot! I got a package yesterday from one of my moms friends…she added me as a friend on Facebook and saw all my quilts. When she was cleaning out her own stash she set a bunch of fabric aside for me and TADA! a package! with 34 lbs of fabric in it!! I already sorted it all and added it to my stash, I think I now have more than double what I did have! There are a bunch of Christmas fabrics and even a project that was started using templates and what not. She sent me the templates, the magazine, the left over fabric and the blocks that have been done. I have never used templates before and might try one block (the Santa’s are what she gave up on, she got all the trees) but $5 says I give up too and then will just take the blocks she has done, turn the two Santa’s into something like a pillow or a dolly quilt and the tree blocks will become something more, add sashing, a little throw, a wall hanging….a tree skirt for all I can tell. Let the creative juices flow!

aunt J's quilt

I finished the top to my Aunt J's quilt. There are several mistakes. To start with I am in need of practice with half square triangles. I am a lot better with the other method where you do one square and sew on both sides of a line, but I am still not perfect either way. I also made two blocks later after not cutting enough triangles and was not as careful with them as I should have been and put some strips on backwards. I didn't realise it until I had put the blocks together. OOPS! Oh well! If I were more patient maybe I would have undone them and then tried again but by the time I got to those two blocks I was ready for something new! Has that happened to anyone else? While I love the fabric and the pattern I was ready to move on!

Just to help understand that green border here is the main fabric before I cut it! See the little green and gold in it? A was making fun of me when I put the little green border on, calling me a hippy wanna be and what not. Then when I put the second border on he said "oh, that actually looks really cool." Thanks honey, sometimes I am not as crazy as you think I am.

I loved this fabric and was really sad to see that I didn't get any extra. Then again Aunt J bought the fabric for me so I shouldn't complain at all. She bought two purples because she couldn't decide which one she liked more with the main fabric, the green, and the backing. She also bought this beautiful pink fabric for me to back the quilt I had made for one of my friends too. We got all this at QuiltWorks Northwest when R was only 2 months old! I kept putting this quilt off for no reason other than I was a little intimidated by it. I finally figured out how to use all the fabrics in it and LOVE IT!

Also today, I caught R playing with tools. OK, I actually gave her the tools in exchange for a hammer and a sharp little screwdriver. I'd much rather have her play with a wrench and a pair of thick pliers. She was working on her "car" that her uncle B and his girlfriend (I'll call her R's Aunt K because shes as close as we've got for now but B and K are only 19 so there's no rush!) for her last birthday. Whats so cool about her working on her car is that my brother and my dad are both race car drivers...for fun, not professionals. She's a car girl too! I didn't even have to teach that! And yes, you may note that most pictures of my lovely little girl are of her in just her pull up. She doesn't like being dressed! She doesn't strip down at least but she will put up quite the little fight to get dressed. The funny thing is she INSISTS on wearing "jimmy jam" bottoms to bed. She also will ask to put her socks and shoes on when one of us gets ready to go out but she'd be happy to go otherwise unclothed. Silly girl. Enjoy it while you can get away with it!

drafts

Here I am again with nothing really to say. Registering at Target was fun but I am having problems with the website, I used two differnet passwords, one for my own account I set up eons ago for online shopping and then the one for the registery that Adam can remember easily but I used my same e-mail address for both so, ooops! oh well!

I poped into my JoAnns again and didn’t buy anything. I just wanted to double check that they didn’t have the binding or the two blocks for Lavander Mist I am missing (7 and 10) then I was killing time to meet up with my friend so I wandered over to the calicos and was just looking, A has authotrized my next fabric purchase can be for a quilt for our bed and has even agreed on a pattern/color scheme. At first he balked because the mag had the quilt in pink and green (oh it’s Garden Path in McCall’s Quilting from 07 I think, I put it away just 10 minutes ago and don’t want to get it out. We will do it in blue and green, more soothing than perky. He said go for it when he has a job! HORRAY!!!

While I was there I saw bolts of white. I need white! I have a project in mind for those 2 ½ inch squares I was telling you about last time. I want to make a scrap quilt (ok two) for my sewing/guest room that I don’t have here but is something I am going to get when we buy a house. We HAVE to have a guest room and it might as well be my sewing space too as long as I keep it as organized as what I showed you last time! Anyways ramble aside, I saw a picture online for decorating with quilts and loved one of the quilts in it so much I sat down with graph paper and drew out what it would look like for a twin size (oh in this guest room I dream of we have a trundle/day bed with two twins so we can have one or two guests without takign up the whole room and if they are not comfortable sharing a bed at least no one is stuck on the couch).

I then figured out how much white or cream fabric I would need. I was lookign for somethign to do to kill time and decided to play around with the pattern and made something that looked similar but not a total match.
Again calculated out how much white/cream I would need and added it to the prior calculations, since these WERE coordinating scrap quilts they should have the same base color right? so 9 yards is what I came up with. Most bolts have 8 on them. Ok I say, if I order a bolt and get 8 yards and am careful I might just have enough, or I could buy 1 1/2-2 yards whiel I special order a bolt of the same stuff and can get started while waiting! I looked at the prices on three bolts of white that I liked and was surprised to see that they were $3.99. I don't know if JoAnns takes coupons for special orders, somethign inside me says no but already thats not bad! so a bolt of white is second on the list of things to get when I can spend again on fabric. My plan is to use these as a leader/ender project, so theres no real rush but I'd love to get leading and ending soon!

While I am showing you things out of my scratch book (doodle book?) I should show you the Hungry Caterpillar quilt I designed but have not made yet. (need to get on that fabric purchase soon too!) I never really liked the two patterns I saw for it out there but liked parts of them, so I took a little of each, spent some time scribbling away and came up with this: true it would look better if I used colored pencils but I think you are all creative enough to imagine it!

um....well I just wanted to share I guess

I told myself I wasn't going to post anything today, nothing worthwhile has really happened! but then A was wonderful. I took everything out of the bathroom and sorted through it while R was taking her rest this afternoon and A saw this and went in with chemicals up the wazoo and cleaned the bathroom. I could eat off the floor and drink out of the toilet it's that clean! I almost want to go soak in the tub but I only enjoy that when I have a good book to read and "Parents" magazine isn't quite what I have in mind (I like to read murder mysteries by candlelight in the bathtub...crazy isn't it?)This is a picture of what our bathroom looks like...well the part I organized. A did clean the shelves for me too! I was trying to take a pic of the whole bathroom but our door to it is about 2/3 the size of a normal door and the toilet is RIGHT next to the door....then the sink is RIGHT there and then the tub. It's one LITTLE bathroom!

I also got R's room cleaned up, when I have some spare cash I need to go to Target and get some more little canvas cube things to sort her toys out into, I have one in her room, one in the laundry room, and three in the hall closet. If they weren't all serving their purpose so well I'd move them all into her room! I have one for her dress up stuff and currently tea party stuff shares a space but I'd like for that to be its own too, and then coloring stuff, I want little drawers for puzzles (she gets so mad when she gets pieces that don't fit the puzzle so I want to organize them all) and then one for the new baby's toys. how many is that? I have space for four or five if I have diapers/wipes there too....since R is still in pull ups!

I also have the kitchen almost perfectly clean, just need to scrub the walls, clean the fridge out, and clean the floors. My laundry room is looking good but I need to clean the machines, I hate how sometimes the soap leaks onto the washer and then the dust/lint gets stuck on it! EWWWEEE but the room was dusted, swept and fabric stuff was straitened out. what, you want to see what my stash looks like now? Here are projects in que. On top are my four finished tops waiting for bottoms, my sewing basket, a box which usually holds my "stash cash" but currently holds yarn and thread with no cash coming anytime soon for it, and then my 2 1/2" squares made from left overs of projects I have finished....I have a plan for them just you wait and see! Next to that is my scrapbook of finished projects, threads under the pipe, a class I took two sessions of before A lost his job and I couldn't pay for any more. Top to bottom JoAnn's Lavender Mist BOTM (need blocks 7, 10, and binding if anyone is headed out there, mine is out here) JoAnn's Natures Bounty BOTM, Simpson's for A (need more flannels for it but its in line because I am actively looking for them) and jungle fabrics for a co-workers baby. Next to those are my books and mags, I am thinking of taking all my mags down to the local print shop and seeing if they will unbind them and put them all in one big binder or something for me since some of them are falling apart.

Here's the cool stuff: OK it's all cool really but this is the true stash! Top shelf first left to right: the things I gathered on the 2005 Western Washington Shop Hop, the first and only one I have gone on but I can't wait to go again! (was going to go this year but don't think it would be wise to go to Seattle that close to my due date) then batting I got on clearance. Next top is Christmas stuff I have cut for:5 adult aprons 3 children's aprons, 3 tree skirts, 2 couch pillows, and something else. Below that is random Christmas fabrics and left overs of the above mentioned so I can make a quilt to coordinate too, then I have my high school t-shirt stuff cut up ready to do SOMETHING with. Next over is Hungry Caterpillar fabric I am trying to collect more of before it's out of stock but have no money to do so...oh catch 22! Left over Dora that I need to do something with, and the fabric I bought to make Butterfly Beauty from Quilters World Feb 2004 and can't find the mag or the pattern!! Next to that all is assorted children's fabric, pink and green things to decorate R's room when we end up somewhere for more than a year or two (curtain fabric and the like) and then clothing projects that I am a little intimidated by.

Are you still with me? This next parts quick I promise! next to the tubs loose is "multi colored" fabrics, bottom shelf has reds, pinks, blues, greens, yellows, purples behind oranges, and whites behind blacks. See I told you it would be fast! oh and on the floor in a big storage tub are all my fleeces and flannels...I really would like to separate them but for now they can share a tub

Well, this has been another pointless but entertaining (I hope) post by yours truly....I am sure I will have something to say tomorrow about registering at Target for baby stuff with a girl friend, or more on cleaning so stay tuned!

birthday planning

R turns three in just under three weeks. I am trying to plan her birthday but on a limited budget I don't know what really to do. I want to have a nice back yard bash with a kiddie pool we have been eyeing and a BBQ or something but we don't have a BBQ either! I really wanted to buy A one for Fathers Day this year but it might have to wait another year or so. I do have a friend who is giving us her charcoal grill, but will we get it in time?

I bought invitations at Target today only to realise when I was at the grocery store that their's less sesame street stuff out there than Dora and I had seen some Dora stuff at another store yesterday. Back to Target I will go after work and return the invitations and get them from the party store in town. Then maybe I will to go to JoAnns and see if they have any cake decorating stuff, not to buy but just to scope out (and I need some thread) I think Dora will be fairly easy and I know R loves her so it works out well.

I don't know who all to invite but I want some good friends there. I also want it to be low key. I guess I have until the end of the week to do it without being too last minute. How on earth did her birthday sneak up on us? Last I looked it was MY birthday (April)



in other news, I won my first online give away! Thanks to Tracey I have won some fabric! I can't wait to see it! It couldn't have come at a better time to lift my spirits....A not working, me not sure of a project to work on next, anxious about baby B and everything, this was such a delight to see in my inbox! Maybe our luck is turning around!

I am just about done with Aunt J's quilt, just have the two borders to put on! (and of course the backing and what not but shhhh)

almost out of projects!

I am almost down with two quilt tops that I was working on together….One is a really simple one that I was practicing my leaders and enders with while waiting to be able to buy fabric for my real leaders and enders plan and the other is for my aunt J. I made a lot of mistakes with it, the last being making my last two blocks one night when I was exhausted but waiting for R to cry herself to sleep and needed something to focus on other than her crying. I also need to work on my half square triangles. Oh well, all is part of learning the process right? and my aunt wouldn’t care if I sent her something that looked like garbage, she knows I am still newish to this and that I made it with love and the best of intentions.

The upside is more projects crossed off my list before I can go buy more fabric…the down side, I am almost to a point where I need to go buy more fabric to use the fabric I have. This makes no sense to A and I am not very good at explaining it in guy terms, I tried to relate it to how you need more fishing thingies (but I used to word “thingies“) in order to go fishing. Then I tried to relate it to video games, but he only plays two. Then…I gave up. A just doesn’t understand the “stash”vs “planed project” Its something I keep telling my dad had to get over too with my mom and her quilting and whenever the two of them are together they tease us but it’s nice to have something in common with my mom, and for him to have something to joke about with my dad.

So my main dilemma here is that I don’t know what my next project will be! I have a huge list of things that I want to work on but I need to get more fabric for them, and I have a few that I don’t feel ready for but I have everything ready to go. I guess I dig in right? Learn as I go, that’s what this whole thing is about! I have the first five or six blocks of JoAnn’s Lavender Mist BOTM here, I don’t know how to do applique yet but it looks like they have good instructions. I have the whole Natures Bounty kit from JoAnns. I also have everything from when my mom, her friends A and E and I went on the Western Washington Shop Hop (oh how I wanted to do that this summer too but not 9 months pregnant I can’t!) back in 2006. The summer before I had R. I have the kit to a little boy blanket too but don’t know who I would make that for so I don’t want to start it yet.

I do have all the fabric for a quilt I wanted to make a while ago, but have lost the pattern and can’t find a copy of the magazine it came from it’s so old! Butterfly Beauty…I will have to get the tub out to see what magazine it was in but it was either Quilters World or American Patchwork Quilts. My guess is it was the first of the two!

something I was working on gathering fabric for before A lost his job was a Hungry Caterpillar collection to make two quilts and a nursery set to try to donate or give to a friend or something (I don’t want it here because it doesn’t go with the themes but I do want to make it because I love the story and the fabrics). I have a few things for it but not much and am now getting nervous about not being able to get what I want/need for it! I am going to stash some tip money for the next few weeks and hit up the local Ben Franklin which I know had the material a while ago to see what I can get, and if need be start searching online again. I see they now have a Brown Bear Brown Bear collection out and I want to do something similar with that too! oh caching caching right? (think the $$ sound) A gathering I will go (in secret…I will have to smuggle this all in hehehe!)

quilt tops

here I am again....I actually posted a better blog about these quilts at allpeoplequilt.com but I can't make pictures work over there like I can here so I am posting these here with shorter stories!

this is the quilt I made with christmas fabric charm packs. I don't love the black and yellow in it, and the red is just off what I love but it was a fun project!

This is R's big girl bed quilt top. it is 66X90 right now and I can't figure out how I want to finish it...if I want borders or not, if so what it/they will look like etc. Any advice would be taken with joy!

my mothers day! 2009!!

I can't belive how much I have been posting here since there was such a long absence of posts for a while there! I have missed blogging and recording my thoughts. Since A isn't working and couldn't do up a mothers day for me like we all wanted this year we have decided that once he has a job we will look on the calander, pick a day and call that my special mothers day! Then we can go out to eat and I can get flowers and presents and whatever else he wants to do for me. I know for Fathers day this year (assuming he's working in the next few weeks) I am going to save up my tip money and get him a grill! It is mostly a present for him but I love BBQ's and theres so much good summer food you can only make on a real grill!

so for today, while it's nothign too special A and R tried to do some sweet things for me. R picked flowers (mostly dandylions but she did manage to find two tulups)
A cleaned the kitchen and I was able to bleach part of the sink. If we keep the kitchen clean all week then we will set up the espresso machine I gave myself for Christmas (it was on sale, PLUS partner shopping days were 40% off so I spent less than $150 on a machine that originally was $400!! and I get beans for it each week for free as a perk!)

While we were outside I managed to give R a little hair cut. It was just a trim up and it's not perfect but for a first try it looks good! She has not been a good photo subject lately so these are the best shots of the cut that I could get out of her before her "rest" and yes she loves to run around nakie but we make her have a diaper on (or big girl undies if she sits on the potty but shes just too busy to sit down for a few minutes!)

I promise I am going to get pictures of the quilt tops I have done but theres too much clutter in the house right now to try and get a picutre taken! I don't know why its so hard for me to clean and keep the place clean but it is! The kitchen and bedroom are what I worked on a week ago and are still in decent but not pristine condition. 20 minutes each and they'd be back to perfect but really? do I want to do that? especially when the rest of the house is a DISASTER? but I need to do it all sometime I know I know. Plus I know it will only get worse if I don't take care of it soon! oh housework!

ABC of ME!

hehe, alright I got taged by this onFacebook and while I don't usually do any of the things I get taged in (I refuse to be the annoying person who tags everyone they know with these things!) I liked this one and decided to do it here!

A - Age: 25
B - Bed size: Queen
C - Chore you hate: folding laundry
D - Dog's name: dont have any!
E - Essential start your day item: "s'deams?" from R with a kiss (her asking if we had sweet dreams)
F - Favorite color: Pink with Green, Blue with Yellow
G - Gold or Silver: Silver
H - Height: 5' 7"
I - Instruments you play(ed): the recorder (who didn't?)
J - Job title: shift supervisor/basrista
K - Kid(s): R (6/7/06) and #2 due 8/1/09
L - Living arrangements: renting the basement of a house with the fam
M - Mom's name: B.
N - Nicknames: Lisapotpie
O - Overnight hospital stay other than birth: just the birth of R
P - Pet Peeve: um...well while I ampregnant what ISN"T a pet peeve, but usually peopel who dont say please or thank you or when you say "hi how are you?" "grande brew" (oir any other order without acknowledging my question or the fact that I care)
Q - Quote from a movie: "cinderella cinderella night and day it's cinderella, do the dishes, fold the laundry...." except I sing it "mommy lisa mommy lisa...."
R - Right or left handed: Right
S - Siblings: B 19
T - Time you wake up: um....whenever R does? or if I have to open at 5 I get up at 4:30
U- Underwear: love the lacey boy shorts but I also like soft cotton panties
V - Vegetable you dislike: I like them all!
W - Ways you run late: when R doenst want to let me go and when A is late home from work
X - X-rays you've had: wrist, ankle, and oodles of teeth =)
Y - Yummy food you make: anything when I actually make things
Z - Zoo favorite:just watching R get excited about the animals

one more week down, 12 left!

I wrote R’s birth story and was going to post it here for you all, but it needs some editing, it’s long (and while I don’t think any of you really need the details I thought I’d like them and maybe R would like it later in life) and since spell check is not working nor is gramar checker and I am not well versed in either of those I need someone to actually read and correct it before I post it. Things that are just off the top of my head I don’t mind less editing, and sometimes not even self editing, but things I want to keep and that have true meaning I do care about.

in other news, nothing going on. I am sore, irritable, you know all the normal pregnancy things. I can’t belive that it’s almost over! Three more months! I am going to go with some girlfriends to register for baby stuff sometime in the next week or two. I am going to do it at Target, I don’t know if anyone will get me anything, but somehow the list making, picking things out, what not will make me feel a little more control and prepared. I also want to get some maternity clothes, hence the wait this long.

I really want to get back to serwing but house work keeps calling my name, and while the housework is getting harder and harder to finish (after 8 hours on my feet serving people at work I don’t want to work too hard at home) I can’t justify sewing in a messy living roomwhen theres laundry to fold, or toys to pick up, or dishes to do….why is that? I really need a sewing room where I doin’t see the clutter. I also am to a point where I have to do a lot of ironing and don’t want to. I know I messed up a good chunk of my half square triangle squares (following me?) and they are now rectangles with four squares and will be a little catiewhompus but I don’t have enough material to start over nor do I have the skill to undo and redo everything so I am just going to have to call it “an imperfectly framed four patch” and move on.

I have a few quilt tops that I want to show you, one I am debating putting a border on or not. I am not allowed to buy any more fabric until (A gets a job and we get caught up on the bills) I use what I have, which means I have to make a bunch of tops without finishing them and I will have more that I will have to some how smuggle fabric in to finish! I will try to get some pics of the tops for you all tomorrow if it doesn’t rain or snow or in other ways get the ground wet outside. Tehre’s not enough room to take pics inside! (well, and my bedroom light is funky and ickie so it wouldn’t turn out well.)

I will ask my border question tomorrow!

not productive

today was one of those days where I really inteded to do a lot but got nothing done. Actually the last two days were that way. I don't often get two days off in a row and had grand plans for these two days. my list included: calling my dentist to reschedual an appointment, calling one of my good friends, cleaning my bedroom, cleaning R's room, organizing all our movies, fold laundry, organize hall closet, and take pictures of my quilt tops that are not finished. The only things I got done were organizing the hall closet and the movies. oh well, thats why I don't live my life by a list.

Since I can't actually go shopping right now, I made a list of things I want to get. Alright I have a list of household things I want but these are selfish things. I thought I would share my little list with you, maybe moreso for me to not lose because I tend to lose lists =) (see I like to write them, I love crossing things off them, but I am so bad about keeping track of them!)

Pleasure Books:
The Coffee House Mystery series by Cleo Coyle (I read the first one and am on number two but I borrowed the books from a friend and they don't have a cover! I like them a lot, easy light reads even though they are mysteries! There's 8 books so far!)
anything JA Jance! I have a few of hers but not enough!

Quilt Books:
Simply Strips and Squares - S McNeill
Jelly Roll Quilts - P & N Lintott
Quilting 101
Quilters Block A Day Calander
The Civil War Love Letter Quilt - R Youngs
The Civil War Diary Quilt - R Youngs
Quilter's Knot - A Sachitano
Quilt as Desired - A Sachitano

Quilt Block of the Month Programs:
Lavender Mist Collection (JoAnn's) I have 1-5 so far
Seams Like Murder (storyquilts.com) I started this with my LQS but then A lost his job and I couldn't justify that expense as much as I wanted somethign to get me out of the house for a few hours a week, but it is online so I can at least pick it up again
Seams Like Halloween (storyquilts.com)
Nothings What it Seams (storyquilts.com)
Words of Wisdom (storyquilts.com)

obviously I am not going out today and getting all these, so please let me know if there's somethign I should add to the lists!

another give away

I have my first follower on here!!! I am so glad that I am finally not just read by myself! Sometimes I wonder....

anyways, welcome to my follower! I hope that you enjoy your time over here! I hope I don't disapoint you.

Hey, does anyone know why I can't copy and paste from word over here like I used to? Is it just my computer? It wouldn't shock me, there seems to be something going on since A has started playing games online here that isn't working like it used to and I can't get the antivirus program to run...yeah lovely isn't it?

anyhoo, the real reason for the random post is that my new follower's blog led me to a give away and I can get more chances to win by sharing it with you...and right now I need all the chance and luck I can get. so head over to http://itching2bstitching.blogspot.com/2009/04/23-more-days-until-i-am-out-of-school.html

A should hear about a job on weds....please cross your fingers, pray for us, send us positive thoughts, whatever it is that you do...we need it! As much as I love my job, working 40 hours a week on my feet with unpredictable hours is wearing me down, especially 27 weeks pregnant!

quilt pictures!

This first quilt is the quilt I made for a coworker's baby. It was from a kit that I bought thanks to R. We were at JoAnn's one day and she grabbed it while I had my back turned and she put it in the cart. R loved quilting almost as much as I do, or at least she likes to sit on my lap while I am working on something.

This is the quilt I made for R's Big Girl Bed! when we converted her crib to a toddler bed. Not long after we realised we'd need the crib again and I started a twin size top, but this one is sweet and I did get it on her bed for a few months! She loves this quilt for playing "where's R?" and having picnics on! It's cool that she can use something with so much imagination!

This is the quilt I made for one of my girlfriend's daughters. I really like it and think it might even be quilt show worthy, but I don't know if I am THAT good yet. It's a fairly simple pattern but it is so fun! As I was making this one I noticed the colors in teh black that I like more than yellow and green. There's a lovely pink, a deep red, a thoughtful blue. Wait, can colors be thoughtful...well you know what I mean. There is another green. We could have found one of those for one of the two yellows, but M picked out the colors and I just went with it. Actually, if I remember correctly we found the yellows and green first and then the black that had them in it! The backign is from one of my regulars who used to make clothes for a private label, it's a soft yellow sweatshirt like material. I just love using something strange, but soft for the back. Not what one would expect.

This is the quilt I made for R's baby dolls. I made one with the fabric left over from the previous quilt for my friends daughter too (with some of the other colors I noticed too) This one is 28 inches by 20 inches. Not huge, but cute! For little girls I like to make something to go along with their quilt. Now I do know that this one does not match the quilt I made for R, but I didn't have any left over fabric, or rather not enough to make a doll quilt, but I did have this left over from when I made a quilt for another friend's daughter. It's sweet and R likes to use this as a "kite" or rather a cape but she doesn't quite get the difference.

And just for fun, here's my sweetie asleep on my bed!

my life in cake?

I have had an interesting day thus far, but a good one.

R woke up at 5:30. The little stink pot! I want to sleep in! I rested on the couch while she played and watched a few cartoons and what not. She got into chocolate. She was bouncing off the walls. We went out side with A while he was waiting for his friend to pick him up to go paintballing for the first time. She and I ended up staying out there for over two hours! She played by herself, with a stick, with a soccer ball. I read a magazine and just enjoyed being outside.

We came in and had lunch and I loaded the dishwasher. I need to move it and run it still but I am enjoying the stillness. After that R wanted to watch doggies and crashed on my bed. I started watching “Last Cake Standing” on Food Network. I love cake decorating but don’t know how to do it. I want to learn! First I have to work on my quilting then I can try and find a place to teach me how to decorate cakes.

The challenge was to tell a life story through a cake. Some very interesting interpretations of that and some interesting ways of telling a story. I think if I were to be in that competition I would make a cake closet. In it I would hang my elementary school uniform, a red graduation gown, my drill team uniform, a water polo suit, and a power suit maybe a letterman’s jacket with water polo, drill and debate on it, a blue graduation gown. I would then hang a dance team outfit, and a red Michaels apron, and my red sweater that I wore on my first date with A, then a black graduation gown with cords and honor medallions. I would then hang my work dress code outfit and a green Starbucks apron and two onesies. I wish I could hang a wedding dress in there but some day maybe. I think that’s the best way to tell who I am. Maybe with the height requirements I would use the closets one on top of the other elementary school on the bottom with a bunch of things in it that I used to play with, cards that hop-it, I’d have to think hard and come up with it all, in the HS closet I’d put a water polo ball, debate notes, chess board, mementoes from a trip to Europe, pom-poms, books, tickets to Tolo and Prom. College I’d have books (I was in the Honors Scholars program) something from Big Brothers/Big Sisters, letters and cards, a laptop (or three…) dance shoes, puzzles. Life after school on top….quilting things, baby toys, books. I’ d like just a plain single layer closet with only clothes, but I think the rules are 3 feet high, so I’d have to separate them.
It would be fun to do!

I entered a contest

I just entered my first online give away today. I just couldn’t pass it up! It can be found at http://www.pigtalesandquilts.com/2009/04/give-away-time.html 30 fat quarters!?! Wow! Itr would come just at a great time!

A has put me on a fabric buying hold for now so my rule of not moving onto the next quilt before finishing the first has gone out the window. I only have backing fabric for two of the quilts and they are low on my list. Lately I have been working on my Aunt J’s quilt. I have been making a ton of mistakes and will tell her that, but how else can one learn? I HAVE to practice half square triangles and getting them all consistent. I need to figure out where I am going wrong, is it in the cutting, the pairing up of the two halves or the stitching? I think I am going to look for a pattern that has a bunch of triangles when I am done with my current projects and take my time, maybe it will only be a wall hanging (to give away) or a lap quilt but something that I can really focus on that one skill.

Other quilts that are in various states: I made a Christmas throw quilt with Moda’s “Isn’t Christmas Jolly?” charm packs. That was fun! I need to figure out the backing and wait to buy that. I also finished the top for R’s big girl bed…Dora!! It turned out really well! I can’t wait to finish it and get it on her bed.

In pregnancy news…nothing really exciting to report. A knows the gender as do many of my co-workers, but if someone tells me they have to put in one week of night duty. Adam was only tempted to tell me once thus far (we’ve known for 3 or 4 weeks now…or he’s known rather) but I can’t get night duty out of him. I am having a lot of pelvic pain and am generally achy but I guess that’s to be expected. Thus far no new stretch marks, and I don’t think I’ve gained much though this past month may have been a lot since I’ve been out of town for work and not eating home food.

Nothing else really to report money is a huge problem right now, but that’s nothing to new, just overwhelming right now. I don’t even know where to begin or what to do or…oh it’s bad. I hate money and I hate money problems. Each cycle gets worse and worse for us and I am at the end of my rope.

renters?

As I am trying to get myself motivated to clean my apartment, which I do rent, and would never buy something like this I was looking around online. I stumbled upon this article: http://realestate.msn.com/article.aspx?cp-documentid=18246184&GT1=35000 and was rather offended by it. There are many reasons why I rent and to own would be foolish at this moment in my life. I dream of someday soon being a home owner but I can’t right now.
While I hope you will read the article yourself and comment and reflect on it how you wish to, I will recap it briefly for you; the article discusses how many communities are banning renters or have a cap on the percentage of rentals they allow within the community. It discusses how many homeowners are pleased with this because they see renters as “termites” or a nuisance. The article also mentions how renters don’t tend to care for the home they live in and that is harmful to the communities. It does bring up the point that having unoccupied homes is more detrimental to a homes value than renters are at this moment, but doesn’t present that point with much effort.

My thoughts on this article ranged from annoyance to irritation and beyond. To start with, I didn’t buy a home because I can’t afford one now. Yes, I pay $X a month in rent and would much rather pay that towards my own home and be able to claim a little more of my home for myself but I have very solid reasons for not buying right now. First off, I don’t have the down payment necessary to buy the kind of house I want. I am in the process of saving up for it and in the mean time I am not going to borrow that too for many many reasons. Secondly I don’t have 6-12 months worth of mortgage payments, utilities, and basic needs (such as food and gas) saved up. In the event that I lose my job, or my husband dies what would I do with a house I couldn’t pay for and bills I couldn’t take care of?

Another thing that irritated me about this article is that no, I don’t take care of the property. I don’t own it, I don’t have any say in it. The owners do, and should. I am currently living in an apartment that needs some help. My landlord painted prior to the tenant before me moving in and did a poor job. I have asked if I could repaint to brighten the place up and was told no. The carpet was poorly laid and I asked what we should do with the parts that are pulling up from the floor and was told to be careful (with a toddler? You kidding me? But ok.) I spent over 6 months trying to get them to fix a garbage disposal that was smelling foul and not working. We even purchased our own to replace it with and tried to ourselves but needed some tools (and a plumber) finally last week they fixed it by taking it out and forbidding us from installing our own. The reason? “we might put an underground sprinkler system in.” um….why? The lawn is about two car lengths by four. They have their own reasons though. Why should I invest in something that I can’t take with me? That I can’t show off my work for? And when I am willing am told not to.

I actually have moved a lot more than I would have liked to lately. We moved out of our first place after a year living there because there were registered sex and violent offenders living in the same building. With a child we were uncomfortable staying from the moment we found out. We never got our deposit back because we never asked for it. Jerks. The second place we lived we were told 11 months into our lease that we would be asked to leave by the 5th of the following month. We had no place to go. We were homeless for over 2 weeks while trying to find a place, and waiting for a place to clear out. Why were we forced to move? Because my landlord lost his home. He bought more than he could afford. (he was a realtor too! Should have known better!) We didn’t get our deposit back from there either because the carpet was poor quality and they had to replace it. We were the second people to move out of that place, the others moved out but had oriental rugs over the whole place. We looked at the other two units and their carpets did the same but did the landlord care? Nope. We have been in the place we are in now since. While I am not thrilled with how dark it is, how poorly up kept is has been, or how energy inefficient it is, I am not moving again until we find an amazing place, we move out of town, or we buy our own place.

I just wish people understood some of the problems with renting, with not being able to do what you want in your own place.

long time since hearing from me....

I haven’t posted anything here in a while, please don’t feel ignored, nothing is going on. I am 14 weeks pregnant now (and 2 days?) I can’t believe how fast its going by! The first trimester, which I am finally out of wasn’t as bad as I know it can be for other people but I was exhausted! I am now just tired. I felt so bad for A’s friend L comes over and the house is a mess because it’s hard enough for me to keep my head up and watch R from the couch forget about cleaning! Well, past that but not back to myself yet.

Some of that might be because I am getting hit over and over with things. We got back from vacation visiting my parents (R and I) last Sunday, Monday -Wednesday I had a migraine (I think from the pressure change) then Weds night R got sick and was up all night with her, Thursday was fine and dandy just tired, Friday I had the day off and recovered. Sat I woke up puking my guts up and shaking with a bad bad pain in my tummy….caught what Regi had, fortunately it was a 6 hour vomit session followed by pain for another 12-18 hours and feeling like I would puke (then a migraine because I let myself get dehydrated) and yesterday I was just weak weak weak! I could barely walk, and spent most the day lying down because I got winded just trying to talk and sit upright. Thank goodness my co-workers were able to cover my shifts for me. This was the first time I have called in sick and am so glad it worked out alright! Today…a cold has shown up in my nose and throat (but I can live through it!). What’s next?

A’s friend came over to watch the Super Bowl last night (I watched it and tried to cheer but ended up dozing between shouts from the boys and piped in when I could) and L (the friend) was able to untangle the jam in my sewing machine’s bobbin so I can sew again! I started working on R’s Dora quilt this morning and it’s looking good! I just don’t have the oomph to stand up and iron! I still want to take my machine in to get it tuned up since it is about 14 years old, but in the meantime I can sew on it.

Something I am going to need to remember when R is ready to go into school that I have only learned about her this winter…she gets up in the morning, but is not really ready to face the day. She will sometimes cuddle with A or I, but she really isn’t herself until she’s had some time to start her day off with something to eat, drink, and some quiet alone time with cartoons. I hate putting her in front of the TV for half an hour or so in the morning but she really is a crab case if we try to interact with her first thing. We will have to plan our morning routine around this when the time comes to get out the door by a certain time. Especially for school!

Nothing else really happening around here, I will try to post more often, I am sure things will start to get more interesting in my house, but in the mean time I am going to go nap!

oh dear

I haven’t posted over here in a while but I thought it was time I did. A and I are going through a really rough patch and I was very very close to leaving him. I actually had told my parents I wanted out. Two days latter I got some news that changes everything…at least I hope it will. We are expecting. I am only about 6-7 weeks along right now but still, I got a yes on the little pee stick. I finally used the doc find for my insurance and will be calling someone tomorrow. I want to see my midwife again but she’s not covered and we are not in a financial position to pay extra to get who I want right now. I do almost feel like I am cheating on her by choosing another midwife though.

I am not excited to tell my parents, but I know I will have to sooner or latter, and the sooner the earlier they can get over it right? I know they are going to ask what was I thinking and what not. I can’t have an abortion, it’s just a personal choice I cannot make. I am not pro-life, well I am but not to the point that I am anti pro-choice, I just can’t do it myself but I understand why someone would and I respect and honor that choice.

A lot of our relationship problems have come from the loss of our son. I can’t believe the nurse let it slip that it was a boy but I am glad to have known for closure. Some of you may remember, we lost him at thirteen weeks gestation and had a D & C to remove his remains (it was a missed miscarriage, or an incomplete miscarriage…I forget what they called it but his body had started to calcify within me) anyways, that loss caused a rift between us that we couldn’t fix on our own. Not that a new child or a new pregnancy will solve it, but it did open his eyes that this is a relationship he does want to work on and save.

He is going to get some insurance help from his work and see someone, and we will see someone together.

I anticipate the question “how did you let this happen?” Well…R was conceived with a misused or old condom, our son was conceived while I was on a low dose hormone pill that I was taking because the high dose/normal stuff made me MOODY! I was most recently using the nuva ring and really liked it’s convince and the way it dispensed hormones, they didn’t affect my mood much, but we hadn’t had sex in over four months because we had both hurt each other so badly that I wasn’t keeping as close a track when to put it in and take it out like I normally had been. I don’t think it was more than four weeks in (which technically is one more than they say but my doc said it can work up to 5 weeks in one out and I was trying to save a little money) after this one, I am getting mirena or another IUD for 5 years!