its been a while

I really do miss going to school. I remember moving into the dorms for the first time, Dad hid all the power cords perfectly and oh it was great. Then when my roomie moved out I rearranged and LOVED it. I love being able to set things up, get them organized. I love moving in and out (and hate it when I am tired, want to take a nap and realize all my clothes are in a heaping pile on the bed and my boxes are organized all over the floor.) I remember how good it felt to finally have that last box unpacked, to look around the room and realize I had done it (most the time with little help, just bringing the boxes in) I miss buying textbooks (but not the paying for them.) I miss school supply shopping. Yesterday when A and I were having dinner I asked him to make sure I went back to school. I am going to spend this year researching schools, requirements, studying for the GREs again (and hopefully doing better) and then maybe start applying. I am going to make it my “educational goal” for this year.

I know part of being a mother is being tired, especially with a young baby, but man, I think I am pushing it. Last time I went to the docs my iron was really low (they took it twice they were so sure it wasn’t that low!) I have been taking my prenatal vitamins still and have been trying to eat iron rich foods, but I don’t know if it’s any better, or if there’s something else going on. Maybe I am just being a wimp when it comes to sleep. I have another appointment tomorrow, so we will find out about my iron levels, and thank goodness I don’t have work tomorrow. Although last time I got to go in late to work (instead of 5 am) she went to bed no problem around 8pm and was down for the night…then when I had to be at work at my normal time, it was 1am or 2am before she went to bed. Isn’t that always the case?

I have been having a lot of problems pumping lately. This morning I got ½ oz after 15 minutes on each side….Pathetic isn’t it? I am not sure what’s going on, maybe lack of sleep, maybe not enough fluids, maybe stress about bills, or maybe I am not consuming enough calories. I really don’t know, but it’s frustrating. I think I have a total of 6 oz in the freezer now….she will eat all of that in one day while I am at work. I have been trying to pump from one side after feeding her from the other, but haven’t had much success yet. I am hoping that my milk production will increase because of it…and soon. We are going to have to use some formula (Which R doesn’t like) for a few days while I keep working on it. I will ask about that at the docs tomorrow too.